Why You Should Go High When They Go Low: How to Respond to Adversity, Violence & Unkindness

We expect people to treat us with kindness, love and respect. But the truth is that some simply don’t. They just don’t. There are moments in life when we are shocked to discover that our life partner, work colleague or a friend can be not only unkind to us but also mean, emotionally violent and even toxic. How about that?

What happens then to our faith in love, morality and kindness?

We feel betrayed. It’s unfair. They shouldn’t have said that. They shouldn’t have done that.

No, probably they shouldn’t have.

But the question and greatest test for you is to figure out how you respond to that. What are you like in the face of adversity, dishonesty and violence? Do you also compromise your humanity and values by responding to it aggressively - with anger, fear and the desire to harm and hurt?

No, I am not talking about the whole idea ‘turn the other cheek’ here.

I loved what Michelle Obama said in relationship to Trump’s rude, bullying rhetoric toward minorities: ‘When they go low, we go high’.

When you are hurt by someone’s inhumanity, it becomes a test for your own humanity.

It’s the test of how strongly you stand your ground, your value system, and what actions you take when someone is being unfair to you. Do you play their game? Or, instead, do you keep your dignity and hold your head up high? Do you play the game of dishonesty or the one of truth and humanity?

That’s your call.

But I have personally sworn - even in the darkest of times and in the face of the most dire challenges - to always rise high when they fall low.

When you respond to violence violently, you are no better than your  aggressor. You’ve become one too. And your aggressor has then achieved their goal.

Staying in your truth isn’t weakness.

Staying human isn’t weakness.

Standing in your truth and remaining human in the face of cruelty - emotional or physical - is a sign of strength.

Standing up to violence with non-violence is a sign of strength.

Do you know how the small nation of Lithuania caused the collapse of the Soviet Empire? With flowers and by holding hands.

When the country asked for independence and started breaking away from the union, the Soviets sent in the tanks. Lithuanian truth fighters didn’t have guns or tanks to defend themselves with. They went out into the streets and held hands and waved flowers. When the Russians tried to occupy the TV tower and other news stations, people stood in line, leaving it up to the soldiers to decide whether to crush the people, to crush humanity, and to crush freedom.

Only few tanks dared drive over the people…

With 13 casualties, Lithuania withstood the mighty Russian army of thousands. Without a single gun. Without a single tank.

What will you do when, metaphorically speaking, tanks roll into your life?

How will you respond to violence and aggression then?

At a time when violence, bullying and abuse are becoming institutionalised, your response matters more than ever.
Whether the tanks come rolling in from your government, boss or lover.

It is your call as to how to respond.

I am getting together a group of people who are committed to living out their truth, who want not only to know their values but also to act them out and have their reality reflect what they believe in. Want to be part of it? Check out my Hero’s Journey Circle.